HORRIFIC ASSAULT: PASTOR WADEN HARASSES MCDONALD'S EMPLOYEE

In a shocking turn of events, local pastor Waden was witnessed assaulting a McDonald's employee during the lunch rush yesterday afternoon. Eyewitnesses report that the altercation began when Waden complained loudly about his order. The McDonald's employee, identified as John Doe, apologized for the inconvenience, but Waden launched into a tirade.